Friday, August 26, 2011

There's No Talking in Baseball

Today is Friday, which usually means a Friday fun post. But guys? The topic for today is anything but fun. It's serious. Very serious. So put your serious pants on and bear with me.

Last Friday I went to a Pittsburgh Pirates game at the lovely PNC Park with two of the besties Leah and Jenny, my cousin Sara, and her fiance Andy. Despite some heavy rain/floods and a...shall we say....interesting 3 1/2 hour car ride*, the five of us spent six innings hanging out in some awesome right field seats enjoying each other's company.

Although we are all in our 20s and *gulp* 30s, there wasn't any alcohol being consumed. No vulgar language was being tossed around. We were just happy to people watch, laugh at the kid behind us who fell in a tray full of salsa, and occasionally cheer for the Pirates when they did something spectacular.

You know, a typical baseball outing. Right?


Around the 7th inning, just as Leah and I were (for some reason) doing our own version of the Barry Gibb Talk Show sketch on SNL, an older gentleman in front of us turned around and said, "Girls, you've been at it nonstop since you got here. This is a baseball game."

OK, granted our version of the sketch wasn't particularly very good, but we all sat for a moment dumbfounded just the same.

Did we seriously just get scolded for....talking?????

Honestly, what did the man expect? That we should sit in reverent silence for 54 outs, quietly and thoughtfully analysing each pitch and swing of the bat????

I consider myself a pretty thoughtful sports fan. For instance, I'm mindful of standing up too much in front of old people. They don't like it. They get cranky when you do it.

"Sit down! You're blocking the game!"

You know the people I'm talking about. And, no lie, I've seen a man use his crutch to hit a person standing in front of him. Ergo, unless something super exciting/intense is happening, I'm fine with sitting.

I'm also ok with not cussing in front of small children. Not that I cuss too much in public anyway (only in my car, and those people TOTALLY deserve it), but let's be's not difficult to watch what you say.

I know, I can be a damper on the swearing streak you think is adequately expressing your displeasure at your team's playing, the refs, the coaches, the other team, etc. But, guess what? The people on the field can't hear you. The kids can. So pretty much just sound like a jack-ass.

As for alcohol....I know a lot of adults like to enjoy an adult beverage or two (or three or four) with their sports watching. But, you know what? When you're passed out in your seat (or worse, vomiting on it), no one is happy with you. NO ONE.

Also not good fan etiquette?? Brushing the person's hair in front of you.
So, what's the moral of this story?

Sports spectating has an understood set of boundaries and ethics to which we should all try to adhere. People pay good money to go watch a game, and they want to be able to enjoy it. Don't be a drunk, potty-mouthed, "you make a better door than a window" nuisance.

On the other hand, clearly the guy in front of us had his grumpy pants on. Because, while there is no crying in baseball, talking is definitely allowed.

*For future reference, planning a Pirates game, a Britney Spears concert, a ZZ Top concert, and major roadwork all at the same is NOT a good idea. Also not a good idea? Drinking a whole bottle of water before sitting in 3 and a half hours of traffic.

So sports fans, have you ever been scolded at a game for being a "bad fan"? Have you ever scolded anyone? Hit me up and let me know!

Images provided by The Sports-o-Nista.


Anonymous said...

That was awesome Meg!!! I had a lot of fun at the game. The old fart had a lot of nerve when he yelled at us. It is funny the he yelled and said "you are a a baseball game" Exactly a baseball game. If we were at a tennis match or a golf tournament I would understand the need to be quiet for concentration but come on old man who had women's hoop earings on! Until our next Pirates game!!!!

l-bomb said...

i like how us (well me) combing the guy's mullet wasn't explained... it gives it an air of mystery. and on top of wearing women's CZ hoops and not appreciating the barry gibb talk show remix, his friend was sporting one sad old man ponytail. no wonder he was so grumpy... i find us charming! side note: i wonder if he had seen the little kid slip he would've yelled at him. something to the effect of, "you've been crying about falling in salsa since the 4th inning. this is a baseball game!"

Sports-O-Nista said...

Agreed! The kid in the salsa was wayyy more annoying than us.

Kristin @ What She Said said...

I disagree. I think brushing the hair of the person in front of you is totally acceptable.

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